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Paint Names Get Real, and Rowdy

Thursday, June 25, 2015

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TUMBLR--With actual monikers like Flapjack and Mole's Breath, Dead Salmon and Grandma's Sweater, paint names are not all that easy to parody.

But Jeff Wysaki has sure given it one entertaining try.

Wysaki, the mastermind behind Tumblr's Obvious Plant, recently took his signature prank to paint at his local hardware store, where he inserted fake names on the sample chips.


And his suggestions are compelling. So long, black. Hello, "The Eternal Darkness That Will One Day Consume Us All (GRO55)."

And that front-door red you've been searching for? Could it get any redder than "Tarantino Red (MURDR)?"

"Paint colors always have such ridiculous names -- Emerald Isle, Toasted Almond, etc," Wysaki told the Huffington Post. "I just thought it would be fun to take it one step further and make them even more ridiculous."

Ridiculous? Maybe not. Is Spanish Olive (real paint) any more descriptive than Wysaki's Olive-ia Newton John (70YY)?

What's easier to visualize? Narcissus (real paint) or Mmmmmmm, Flesh (YUM 62/53)?


And who would not lay down good money for Blond. James Blond as an alternative to off-white? And Barney's Blood over lavender?

Enjoy Wysaki's handiwork. And, when appropriate, heed his advice.




Tagged categories: Architectural coatings; Color + Design; Marketing; North America; Paint and Coating Sales

Comment from Sarah Geary, (6/25/2015, 8:27 AM)

What an interesting use of Leetspeak. As a light-hearted criticism, he may want to address the consistency issue among the GR055 category as both shades pictured (O53) could not have the same code. I always get a kick out of the names used when I am searching for a paint color, but this is genuinely amusing to me.

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