Jokes and Other Diversions


January 21, 2013

Polly Want Some Bloodshed?

Late one night, a burglar broke into a house that he thought was empty. He tiptoed through the living room but suddenly he froze in his tracks when he heard a loud voice say, “Jesus is watching you!”

Silence returned to the house, so the burglar crept forward. “Jesus is watching you!” the voice boomed again.

The frightened burglar stopped dead. Frantically, he looked all around. In a dark corner, he spotted a bird cage and in the cage was a parrot.

He asked the parrot, "Was that you who said, ‘Jesus is watching me?’”

“Yes”, replied the parrot.

The burglar breathed a sigh of relief, then he asked the parrot, “What's your name?”

“Clarence,” said the bird.

“That's a dumb name for a parrot,” sneered the burglar. “What idiot named you Clarence?”

“The same idiot who named the pit bull Jesus.”


Current Item rating: 4.1 out of 5

Rate this Item:

...Really?
1
2 3 4 HI-larious
5
 
   

Previous items from the past weeks

January 18, 2013
Bumper Stickers
It’s lonely at the top...

January 18, 2013
FOR THOSE OF US WHO REMEMBER.....The Hollywood Squares
From the days when the Hollywood Squares game show...

January 17, 2013
3 Wise Men
The same question was posed...

January 17, 2013
Taking the Good with the Bad
An artist asked a gallery owner...

January 16, 2013
Bumper Stickers
I get enough exercise...

January 16, 2013
Bad News
Doctor: "I've got very bad news...

January 15, 2013
The Doctor Can't See You Now
A psychiatrist’s secretary...

January 15, 2013
Cost Savings
A big company offered $50...

January 14, 2013
Bumper Stickers
Time is...

January 14, 2013
Welcome to the Psychiatric Hotline
Welcome to the Psychiatric Hotline...