Jokes and Other Diversions


September 22, 2023

Horse Thief

A cowboy rode into town and stopped at a saloon for a drink. Unfortunately, the locals always had a habit of picking on strangers, which he was. When he finished his drink, he found his horse had been stolen.

He goes back into the bar, handily flips his gun into the air, catches it above his head without even looking and fires a shot into the ceiling.

"WHICH ONE OF YOU SIDEWINDERS STOLE MY HORSE?" he yells, with surprising forcefulness. No one answers.

"ALL RIGHT, I'M GONNA HAVE ANOTHER BEER, AND IF MY HOSS AIN'T BACK OUTSIDE BY THE TIME I FINNISH, I'M GONNA DO WHAT I DUN IN TEXAS! AND I DON'T LIKE TO HAVE TO DO WHAT I DUN IN TEXAS!"

Some of the locals shift restlessly. He has another beer, walks outside, and his horse is back! He saddles up and starts to ride out of town. The bartender wanders out of the bar and asks, "Say, pardner, before you go ... what happened in Texas?"

The cowboy turns back and says, "I had to walk home."


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