Jokes and Humor

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February 5, 2020

More Paraprosdokians

1. I didn’t say it was your fault; I said I was blaming you.

2. Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.

3. Behind every successful man is a woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman.

4. A clear conscience is the sign of a fuzzy memory.

5. You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.

6. Money can’t buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with.

7. There’s a fine line between cuddling and holding someone down so they can’t get away.

8. I used to be indecisive. Now I’m not so sure.

9. You’re never too old to learn something stupid.

10. To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.

11. Nostalgia isn’t what it used to be.

12. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

13. Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.

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