Jokes and Humor

Jokes and Other Diversions

| More

June 1, 2018

Saved by the Bible

An elderly woman had just returned to her home from an evening of church services when she was startled by an intruder. She caught the man in the act of robbing her home of its valuables and yelled, "Stop! Acts 2:38!" ("Repent and be baptized, in the name of Jesus Christ so that your sins may be forgiven.") 


The burglar stopped in his tracks. The woman calmly called the police and explained what she had done. 

As the officer cuffed the man to take him in, he asked the burglar, "Why did you just stand there? All the old lady did was yell a scripture to you." 

"Scripture?" replied the burglar. "She said she had an ax and two 38s!"

Current Item rating: 3.9 out of 5

Rate this Item:


...Really?
1
2 3 4 HI-larious
5
Your Rating:


   

Humor Archive | Submit your own Item


Previous items from the past weeks

May 31, 2018
Save Your Soul
"Dad, did you...

May 31, 2018
Making a Living
Two small boys...

May 30, 2018
Stuck in a Ditch
An out-of-towner...

May 30, 2018
Heed the Warnings
What was written...

May 29, 2018
Baked Goods
A young man...

May 29, 2018
Expanding Vocabulary
When words newly...

May 28, 2018
Over Easy
A guest in an upscale hotel...

May 28, 2018
Fair Trial
Before a burglary trial...

May 25, 2018
Signage Shortage
Exit sign manufacturers...

May 25, 2018
The Magician
"What does your father...

May 24, 2018
Job Opening
Kowalski, fresh out...

May 24, 2018
Making Things Worse
A young girl...

May 23, 2018
Check the Menu
When the waitress...

May 23, 2018
Tricky Names
A New York...

May 22, 2018
Hunting Season
The Wednesday night...


See humor archive
Advertisements
 
SAFE Systems, Inc.

 
WEFTEC Show

 
Fischer Technology Inc.

 
RCG America

 
Sauereisen, Inc.

 
Modern Safety Techniques

 
Sidewinder/Persyst Enterprises, Inc.

 
Safety Lamp of Houston, Inc.

 
Tarps manufacturing, Inc.

 
 
 

Technology Publishing Co., 1501 Reedsdale Street, Suite 2008, Pittsburgh, PA 15233

TEL 1-412-431-8300  • FAX  1-412-431-5428  •  EMAIL webmaster@paintsquare.com


The Technology Publishing Network

PaintSquare the Journal of Protective Coatings & Linings Paint BidTracker

 
EXPLORE:      JPCL   |   PaintSquare News   |   Interact   |   Buying Guides   |   Webinars   |   Resources   |   Classifieds
REGISTER AND SUBSCRIBE:      Free PaintSquare Registration   |   Subscribe to JPCL   |   Subscribe to PaintSquare News
MORE:      About PaintSquare.com   |   Privacy Policy   |   Terms & Conditions   |   Support   |   Site Map   |   Search   |   Contact Us