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Custom Paint Jobs Take Ugly Honors

Friday, January 4, 2013

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Some cars are born ugly; others have ugliness thrust—or painted—upon them.

Now, readers of the website Jalopnik have anointed the worst of the worst custom car paint jobs.

Sperm car Internet

Sperm adorn a Toyota Corolla. Why, Jalopnik couldn't even guess.

How bad are they?

There's a Corolla festooned in sperm. A creeped-out memorial to Michael Jackson. "Lambo doors and chimpanzee details" on a 2007 Pontiac. SpongeBob on a '94 Corvette.

There's even a valentine to Nickelback, the band everyone (except the car owner, apparently) loves to hate. And another Vette covered in ... nail polish?

Dragon Vette

Worst paint quality honors went to this 2006 Corvette, "which looks like it was done in nail polish," the site said. "At least, the painter could have taped off the headlights and the rest of the glass."

Don't Express Yourself

"A custom paint job is a way for you to express yourself through your car," the site's Raphael Orlove writes. "Jalopnik readers have found ten car painters who should keep their expressions to themselves."

Spongebob car
Corvette Forum / Jalopnik

Who lives in a pineapple painted on a '94 Corvette? SpongeBob Squarepants.

The site shows its Top 10 picks and invites readers to submit other candidates. Alas, there is no shortage of candidates.

The resulting gallery will surely have you dusting off that old Schwinn in no time.

Dragon Vette

And the winner is... Dragon Vette, crowned "the worst custom Corvette in the world." It's the same Vette that had the "nail polish" job, "in an earlier and significantly more horrifying incarnation," Jalopnik reports.



Tagged categories: Automotive coatings; Contests; Design; Paint application

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