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October 2, 2012

Compute This

Not long ago, Bill Gates took a swipe at the auto industry, scoffing: "If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25 cars that got 1,000 miles per gallon.”

GM shot back: “Yes, but would you want your car to crash twice a day?"

Not only that, Microsoft’s many critics added, but....

Every time they repainted the lines on the road, you would have to buy a new car.

Occasionally, your car would die on the freeway for no reason, and you would just accept this, restart and drive on.

Occasionally, executing a maneuver would cause your car to stop and fail, and you would have to re-install the engine. For some strange reason, you would accept this, too.

You could only have one person in the car at a time, unless you bought "Car95" or "CarNT." But then you would have to buy more seats.

Apple would then make a car that was solar powered, reliable, five times faster, and twice as easy to drive, but would run on only 5 percent of the roads.

Mac car owners would get expensive Microsoft upgrades to their cars, which would make their cars run much slower.

The oil, gas and alternator warning lights would be replaced by a single "general car default" warning light.

New seats would force everyone to have the same size butt.

The airbag system would say "Are you sure?" before going off.

If you were involved in a crash, you would have no idea what happened.

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October 1, 2012
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See humor archive

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