PaintSquare.com


The First Word in Protective & Marine Coatings

A Product of Technology Publishing / PaintSquare
JPCL | PaintSquare News | Durability + Design | Paint BidTracker

Jokes and Humor

Jokes and Other Diversions

| More

September 28, 2012

The Best Defense

A defendant in a major lawsuit was talking to his lawyer. “If I lose this case, I’ll be ruined!” he fretted.

“It’s in the judge’s hands now,” said the lawyer.

“Would it help if I sent the judge a box of cigars?”

“Oh no! This judge is a stickler for ethical behavior. A stunt like that would prejudice him against you. He might even
hold you in contempt of court. You shouldn’t even smile at the judge.”

Eventually, the judge found in favor of the defendant. As the man left the courthouse, he said to his lawyer, “Thanks for
the tip about the cigars. It worked!”

“I’m sure we would have lost the case if you’d sent them,” the lawyer said.

“But, I did send them.”

“What? You did?” said the lawyer, incredulously.

“Sure. I sent the cigars to the judge, but enclosed the plaintiff’s business card.”

Current Item rating: 4.2 out of 5

Rate this Item:


...Really?
1
2 3 4 HI-larious
5
Your Rating:


   

Humor Archive | Submit your own Item


Previous items from the past weeks

September 27, 2012
Old Folks, New Technology
I was visiting my daughter...

September 26, 2012
The Bribe
At the height of a political...

September 25, 2012
Double Positive
A linguistics professor...

September 24, 2012
Bright Guy
A guy and his gal...

September 21, 2012
Temper, Temper
Doctor, you must help me...

September 20, 2012
Tight Budget
Hoping to surprise her husband...

September 19, 2012
Grave Spitting
“Well,” snarls the tough...

September 18, 2012
The Wife Says
Yes...

September 17, 2012
Genius Child
Peggy Sue brags to...

September 14, 2012
T-G-I-F
A businessman gets on...

September 13, 2012
Signs
On a desk...

September 12, 2012
Let's Play House
A man and a woman...

September 11, 2012
The Wife Says
I want new...

September 10, 2012
St. Patrick
Three Englishmen spot...

September 7, 2012
Signs
In the front yard...


See humor archive

Harsco
Find BLACK BEAUTY® Abrasives

Use our online tool to search by address, city or zip code to find where you can buy BLACK BEAUTY® abrasives. Or call us toll free: 1-888-733-3646


Denso North America Inc.
Denso Protal Liquid Coatings

A full range of fast cure, high build epoxies for a variety of above and below ground corrosion protection.
Call 1-281-821-3355 or Visit densona.com


Elcometer, Inc.
New Elcometer 456 Coating Thickness Gauge

Best In Class Just Got Better. Technologically Intelligent And Robust. Marvelous Design And Durability. An Earth-Shattering Revolution In Coating Inspection.


US Minerals
US Minerals -
Black Magnum

With nationwide production and distribution capabilities, U.S. Minerals supplies a complete range of coal slag and other abrasives to meet all of your blasting needs.


Simpson Strong-Tie
Repair, Protect & Strengthen

Need a coating? Turn to Fox. We have solutions to repair, protect and strengthen concrete, steel and wood substrates. Call 888-760-0369 or email info@foxind.com


PaintSquare
In the NEW issue:

Offshore wind turbine protection, avoiding adhesion failures, new inspector course on subsea insulation, and much more! jpcleurope.com


Manus Abrasive Systems, Inc./Mod-U-Blast Mfg.
Manus Abrasive
& Mod-U-Blast Mfg

stock several handy tools to accomplish a wide range of internal pipe blasting/cleaning.
Dealer inquiries welcome.

 
 
 
Technology Publishing

The Technology Publishing Network

The Journal of Protective Coatings & Linings (JPCL) PaintSquare
Durability + Design Paint BidTracker JPCL Europe

 
EXPLORE:      JPCL   |   PaintSquare News   |   Interact   |   Buying Guides   |   Webinars   |   Resources   |   Classifieds
REGISTER AND SUBSCRIBE:      Free PaintSquare Registration   |   Subscribe to JPCL   |   Subscribe to PaintSquare News
MORE:      About PaintSquare.com   |   Privacy policy   |   Terms & conditions   |   Site Map   |   Search   |   Contact Us
 

© Copyright 2000-2014, Technology Publishing / PaintSquare, All rights reserved
2100 Wharton Street, Suite 310, Pittsburgh PA 15203-1951; Tel 1-412-431-8300; Fax 1-412-431-5428; E-mail webmaster@paintsquare.com