PaintSquare.com


The First Word in Protective & Marine Coatings

A Product of Technology Publishing / PaintSquare
JPCL | PaintSquare News | Durability + Design | Paint BidTracker

Jokes and Humor

Jokes and Other Diversions

| More

September 28, 2012

The Best Defense

A defendant in a major lawsuit was talking to his lawyer. “If I lose this case, I’ll be ruined!” he fretted.

“It’s in the judge’s hands now,” said the lawyer.

“Would it help if I sent the judge a box of cigars?”

“Oh no! This judge is a stickler for ethical behavior. A stunt like that would prejudice him against you. He might even
hold you in contempt of court. You shouldn’t even smile at the judge.”

Eventually, the judge found in favor of the defendant. As the man left the courthouse, he said to his lawyer, “Thanks for
the tip about the cigars. It worked!”

“I’m sure we would have lost the case if you’d sent them,” the lawyer said.

“But, I did send them.”

“What? You did?” said the lawyer, incredulously.

“Sure. I sent the cigars to the judge, but enclosed the plaintiff’s business card.”

Current Item rating: 4.2 out of 5

Rate this Item:


...Really?
1
2 3 4 HI-larious
5
Your Rating:


   

Humor Archive | Submit your own Item


Previous items from the past weeks

September 27, 2012
Old Folks, New Technology
I was visiting my daughter...

September 26, 2012
The Bribe
At the height of a political...

September 25, 2012
Double Positive
A linguistics professor...

September 24, 2012
Bright Guy
A guy and his gal...

September 21, 2012
Temper, Temper
Doctor, you must help me...

September 20, 2012
Tight Budget
Hoping to surprise her husband...

September 19, 2012
Grave Spitting
“Well,” snarls the tough...

September 18, 2012
The Wife Says
Yes...

September 17, 2012
Genius Child
Peggy Sue brags to...

September 14, 2012
T-G-I-F
A businessman gets on...

September 13, 2012
Signs
On a desk...

September 12, 2012
Let's Play House
A man and a woman...

September 11, 2012
The Wife Says
I want new...

September 10, 2012
St. Patrick
Three Englishmen spot...

September 7, 2012
Signs
In the front yard...


See humor archive

Corrosion Probe, Inc.
From Detection to Correction

Corrosion Probe, Inc. has the Most Concrete Coatings Experience and Expertise. Contact us today at
860-767-4402, www.cpiengineering.com


Mitsubishi Gas Chemical America
Performance Amine 1,3-BAC

A highly reactive cycloaliphatic diamine offering superior performance. Reasonable cost and curing efficacy makes it suitable for all types of epoxy resin applications.


Blastox/The TDJ Group, Inc.
Blastox - One Step
Lead Abatement

Don't waste $$ on added labor steps with other methods. Don't mix, meter or apply at the job-site. Avoid strict hazardous waste rules.
Let your painters paint!


Termarust Technologies
Termarust (HR CSA) Chemically Stops
Active Corrosion

Pipeline Utility Aerial crossings coated since 1992. Termarust's (HR CSA) was used to overcoat lead paint and preserve cables, pipes and support towers.


Minerals Research & Recovery
PREMIUM SLAG ABRASIVES

Visit mrrinc.com. Companies specializing in abandonment and decommissioning projects have discovered that Sharpshot® 20X50 copper slag is an ideal product for subsea waterjet cutting.
Call Steve: 520-297-4626


Axxiom Manufacturing
Schmidt Improves
Portable Blasters

Schmidt's VBS System reduces blowdown intensity, prevents exhaust from damaging floor while using no screens or filters. Reduces sound; Increasing safety.
Call 1-800-231-2085


HoldTight Solutions Inc.
NO FLASH RUST -
NO CONTAMINANTS

Our HoldTight®102 salt remover & flash rush inhibitor prevents flash rust by removing surface contaminants.
Contact us for your nearest distributor. (800) 319.8802 sales@holdtight.com

 
 
 
Technology Publishing

The Technology Publishing Network

The Journal of Protective Coatings & Linings (JPCL) PaintSquare
Durability + Design Paint BidTracker JPCL Europe

 
EXPLORE:      JPCL   |   PaintSquare News   |   Interact   |   Buying Guides   |   Webinars   |   Resources   |   Classifieds
REGISTER AND SUBSCRIBE:      Free PaintSquare Registration   |   Subscribe to JPCL   |   Subscribe to PaintSquare News
MORE:      About PaintSquare.com   |   Privacy policy   |   Terms & conditions   |   Site Map   |   Search   |   Contact Us
 

© Copyright 2000-2014, Technology Publishing / PaintSquare, All rights reserved
2100 Wharton Street, Suite 310, Pittsburgh PA 15203-1951; Tel 1-412-431-8300; Fax 1-412-431-5428; E-mail webmaster@paintsquare.com