PaintSquare.com
      | Connect Follow us on Twitter Like us on Facebook
About | Subscribe | Advertise
  

 

Jokes and Humor

Jokes and Other Diversions

| More

September 11, 2012

The Wife Says

The wife says: I want new curtains.
The wife means: Also carpeting, furniture, and wallpaper!

The wife says: I need wedding shoes.
The wife means: The other 40 pairs are the wrong shade of white.

The wife says: Hang the picture there.
The wife means: No, I mean hang it there!

The wife says: I heard a noise.
The wife means: I noticed you were almost asleep.

The wife says: Do you love me?
The wife means: I’m going to ask for something expensive.

The wife says: How much do you love me?
The wife means: I did something today you’re not going to like.

The wife says: I’ll be ready in a minute.
The wife means: Kick off your shoes, and take an hour nap.

The wife says: Am I fat?
The wife means: Tell me I’m beautiful.

The wife says: You have to learn to communicate.
The wife means: Just agree with me.

The wife says: Are you listening to me?
The wife means: Too late, you’re doomed.

Current Item rating: 3.5 out of 5

Rate this Item:


...Really?
1
2 3 4 HI-larious
5
Your Rating:


   

Humor Archive | Submit your own Item


Previous items from the past weeks

September 10, 2012
St. Patrick
Three Englishmen spot...

September 7, 2012
Signs
In the front yard...

September 6, 2012
Last Rights
A priest! Somebody get me...

September 5, 2012
The Wife Says
You want...

September 4, 2012
Common Sense
Sam was in his usual...

September 3, 2012
Your Call
Through the pitch-black...

August 31, 2012
Priorities
A guy tells his doctor...

August 30, 2012
Ever Wonder?
Why do they sterilize...

August 29, 2012
Ever Wonder?
Why is lemon juice...

August 28, 2012
Ever Wonder?
Why the sun lightens...

August 27, 2012
I Don't Want to Go to School!
Early one morning...

August 24, 2012
Did You Ever Wonder...
What would George Washington...

August 23, 2012
Did You Ever Wonder...
You know what really hurts...

August 22, 2012
Curiosity
A guy is passing a...

August 21, 2012
Wales Watching
I was in a pub...


See humor archive

NLB Corporation
See NLB Crawler hit the heights

Surface prep 100 ft. and more above the ground is easy with the SRT-10-W1 Crawler. Rotating water jets work fast, with vacuum recovery and wireless controls.


IBIX North America
Surface Preparation – Portable Blasting

Lightweight portable aluminum unit, for cleaning/restoring: pipes, buildings, infrastructure and marine. Micro-air abrasion for Historical Restoration 727-322-4611


Axxiom Manufacturing
Schmidt Improves
Portable Blasters

Schmidt's VBS System reduces blowdown intensity, prevents exhaust from damaging floor while using no screens or filters. Reduces sound; Increasing safety.
Call 1-800-231-2085


Sidewinder/Persyst Enterprises, Inc.
The Sidewinder Model M2 Solvent Recycler

Combat the rising cost of gunwash, thinners, acetone & more while drastically reducing waste disposal coat.


Chicago Corrosion Group
Vendor-neutral corrosion consulting

What you don’t know about painting is costing you a fortune. Call today to see how CCG’s vendor-neutral, owner’s advocacy saves our clients millions.


Industrial Vacuum Equipment Corp.
Hurricane Vacuums
& Dust Collectors

Vacuum and dust collector hose, filters and related accessories.
IndustrialVacuum.com


Dampney Co., Inc.
High Temperature White Paint

New Coating with not yellow, remains white and will withstand temperatures up to 1,200ºF


Advanced Recycling Systems
ADVANCED RECYCLING SYSTEMS (ARS)

Recycling Machines, Dust Collectors, Rapid Deployment units are time-tested and approved for the rugged industrial environment. Contact ARS today!
(330)536-8210


Abrasives Inc.
One Call Orders it All!

Life is good when it’s simple. We distribute Clemco blast equipment, nozzles & parts alongside our proven blast media. Make your call: Abrasives Inc. 800-584-7524


KTA-Tator, Inc. - Corporate Office
KTA-Tator EH&S Services

• Ambient & Worker Exposure Air Monitoring
• Safety & Health Program Development
• Lead Paint Assessments
& Specifications
• Health Hazard & Jobsite Safety Assessments
Call 1-800-245-6379

 
 
 
Technology Publishing

The Technology Publishing Network

The Journal of Protective Coatings & Linings (JPCL) PaintSquare
Durability + Design Paint BidTracker

 
EXPLORE:      JPCL   |   PaintSquare News   |   Interact   |   Buying Guides   |   Webinars   |   Resources   |   Classifieds
REGISTER AND SUBSCRIBE:      Free PaintSquare Registration   |   Subscribe to JPCL   |   Subscribe to PaintSquare News
MORE:      About PaintSquare.com   |   Privacy policy   |   Terms & conditions   |   Site Map   |   Search   |   Contact Us
 

© Copyright 2000-2015, Technology Publishing / PaintSquare, All rights reserved
2100 Wharton Street, Suite 310, Pittsburgh PA 15203-1951; Tel 1-412-431-8300; Fax 1-412-431-5428; E-mail webmaster@paintsquare.com