PaintSquare.com
      | Connect Follow us on Twitter Like us on Facebook
About | Subscribe | Advertise
  

 

Jokes and Humor

Jokes and Other Diversions

| More

September 11, 2012

The Wife Says

The wife says: I want new curtains.
The wife means: Also carpeting, furniture, and wallpaper!

The wife says: I need wedding shoes.
The wife means: The other 40 pairs are the wrong shade of white.

The wife says: Hang the picture there.
The wife means: No, I mean hang it there!

The wife says: I heard a noise.
The wife means: I noticed you were almost asleep.

The wife says: Do you love me?
The wife means: I’m going to ask for something expensive.

The wife says: How much do you love me?
The wife means: I did something today you’re not going to like.

The wife says: I’ll be ready in a minute.
The wife means: Kick off your shoes, and take an hour nap.

The wife says: Am I fat?
The wife means: Tell me I’m beautiful.

The wife says: You have to learn to communicate.
The wife means: Just agree with me.

The wife says: Are you listening to me?
The wife means: Too late, you’re doomed.

Current Item rating: 3.5 out of 5

Rate this Item:


...Really?
1
2 3 4 HI-larious
5
Your Rating:


   

Humor Archive | Submit your own Item


Previous items from the past weeks

September 10, 2012
St. Patrick
Three Englishmen spot...

September 7, 2012
Signs
In the front yard...

September 6, 2012
Last Rights
A priest! Somebody get me...

September 5, 2012
The Wife Says
You want...

September 4, 2012
Common Sense
Sam was in his usual...

September 3, 2012
Your Call
Through the pitch-black...

August 31, 2012
Priorities
A guy tells his doctor...

August 30, 2012
Ever Wonder?
Why do they sterilize...

August 29, 2012
Ever Wonder?
Why is lemon juice...

August 28, 2012
Ever Wonder?
Why the sun lightens...

August 27, 2012
I Don't Want to Go to School!
Early one morning...

August 24, 2012
Did You Ever Wonder...
What would George Washington...

August 23, 2012
Did You Ever Wonder...
You know what really hurts...

August 22, 2012
Curiosity
A guy is passing a...

August 21, 2012
Wales Watching
I was in a pub...


See humor archive

Atlantic Design, Inc.
POWER ON WITH ADI!

The most air flow possible… In the smallest package imaginable… For a price you won’t believe! 866.Call.ADI


Safway Services
One Source. Every Solution.

The Safway Group is your source for multiservices. Painting, coating, insulation and more – all from the most trusted name in the industry.


Advanced Recycling Systems
ADVANCED RECYCLING SYSTEMS (ARS)

Recycling Machines, Dust Collectors, Rapid Deployment units are time-tested and approved for the rugged industrial environment. Contact ARS today!
(330)536-8210


Trelawny Surface Preparation Technology
Surface Preparation Equipment

Manufacturer of needle scalers, grinders, scarifiers and scabblers. Pneumatic tools for Marine and Construction. US distributor CS Unitec: 800-700-5919


Blastrac
HORIZONTAL AND VERTICAL SHOT BLASTING SYSTEMS

The 900VMB is the latest in Vertical Steel Shot Blasters, ideally suited for medium and large- sized vertical steel blast cleaning jobs and applications. It is remote controlled for operator safety, comfort, and productivity. See Video.
1-800-256-3440 www.blastrac.com


U.S. Zinc
Historic Reliability. Innovative Performance.

For 65 years, the success of U.S. Zinc has come from the quality of our people and our products. The protection properties of our zinc dust prolong the life of marine coatings, helping the world work™


Axxiom Manufacturing
Schmidt Introduces
the New miniBRS

Reduced in size, it is incredibly easy to maneuver and operate! The perfect alternative to larger blast & recovery units when project space is limited.
Call 1-800-231-2085

 
 
 
Technology Publishing

The Technology Publishing Network

The Journal of Protective Coatings & Linings (JPCL) PaintSquare
Durability + Design Paint BidTracker

 
EXPLORE:      JPCL   |   PaintSquare News   |   Interact   |   Buying Guides   |   Webinars   |   Resources   |   Classifieds
REGISTER AND SUBSCRIBE:      Free PaintSquare Registration   |   Subscribe to JPCL   |   Subscribe to PaintSquare News
MORE:      About PaintSquare.com   |   Privacy policy   |   Terms & conditions   |   Site Map   |   Search   |   Contact Us
 

© Copyright 2000-2015, Technology Publishing / PaintSquare, All rights reserved
2100 Wharton Street, Suite 310, Pittsburgh PA 15203-1951; Tel 1-412-431-8300; Fax 1-412-431-5428; E-mail webmaster@paintsquare.com