| Connect Follow us on Twitter Like us on Facebook
About | Subscribe | Advertise


Jokes and Humor

Jokes and Other Diversions

| More

June 16, 2011

12 Laws of Golf

1: No matter how bad your last shot was, maintain Inner Peace by knowing that a worse one is yet to come. This powerful law does not expire at the 18th hole but extends over the course of a tournament, a summer and, eventually, a lifetime.

2: Your best round of golf will be followed almost immediately by your worst round ever. The probability of the latter increases with the number of people you tell about the former.

3: New golf balls are water-magnetic; and the more expensive the ball, the greater its attraction. Some expensive clubs are believed to be made with this unusual natural alloy.

4: Golf balls never bounce off trees back into play. If one does, the tree is breaking a law of the universe and should be cut down.

5: The higher a golfer's handicap, the more qualified he deems himself as an instructor.

6: A golfer hitting into your group will always be bigger than anyone in your group. Likewise, any group you accidentally hit into will consist of a football player, a professional wrestler, a convicted murderer and an IRS agent.

7: All 3-woods are possessed by demons. Your mother-in-law does not come close.

8: Golf balls from the same "sleeve" tend to follow one another, particularly out of bounds or into the water. (See Law 3.)

9: The last three holes of a round will automatically adjust your score to what it really should be.

10: Golf should be given up at least twice per month.

11: All vows taken on a golf course shall be valid only until sunset.

12: Since bad shots come in groups of three, your fourth consecutive bad shot is really the beginning of the next group of three.

Current Item rating: 4.2 out of 5

Rate this Item:

2 3 4 HI-larious
Your Rating:


Humor Archive | Submit your own Item

Previous items from the past weeks

June 15, 2011
Coming Clean
Dear Tide...

June 14, 2011
Hospital Regulations
Hospital regulations require...

June 13, 2011
Church Ladies With Typewriters
Thank God for church ladies...

June 10, 2011
The Metric System
The metric system...

June 9, 2011
Making Change
An incompetent counterfeiter...

June 8, 2011
A Woman’s Place
Years before the Afghan conflict...

June 7, 2011
Goodbye, Mother
A young man is walking...

June 6, 2011
Is there a problem?
A policeman pulls over a guy...

June 3, 2011
Perks of Being a Senior Citizen
Kidnappers are not...

June 2, 2011
Wise Choice
An older man, not in the best...

June 1, 2011
When you are young...

May 31, 2011
Silver Lining
A reporter was interviewing a 104...

May 30, 2011
Humor for Lexophiles
If you jump off a...

May 27, 2011
All Bets Are Off
A guy is reading the paper...

May 26, 2011
Trimming the Fat
A manufacturing plant, feeling it was time...

See humor archive

Safway Services
Suspended Access Made Easy With QuikDeck™

The smart choice for suspended access, QuikDeck’s interchangeable, lightweight components make them easy to set up and reassemble when you need to move.

HoldTight Solutions Inc.

Our HoldTight®102 salt remover & flash rust preventer prevents flash
rust by removing surface contaminants. It has no equal; only wannabees.
Contact us for your
nearest distributor.
(800) 319.8802

Sidewinder/Persyst Enterprises, Inc.
The Sidewinder Model M2 Solvent Recycler

Combat the rising cost of gunwash, thinners, acetone & more while drastically reducing waste disposal coat.

Midsun Specialty Products
Stopaq 30+ Year Coatings

Use Stopaq corrosion prevention coatings on pipelines, field joints, tank chimes, structural steel and more. Learn more at

SAFE Systems, Inc.
Portable Blast &
Recovery Equipment

Trailer or skid mounted blast and recovery equipment. Systems designed for maximum versatility, environmental compliance
and overall cost savings.
Call 1-800-634-7278

Control the Tank with DRYCO

Temporary climate control equipment. Dehumidifiers,
Heaters, A/C, Power, More…
Call: 866-379-2600

Axxiom Manufacturing
Revolutionary Units

By integrating Schmidt's Aftercoolers with our blast pots, these systems remove moisture from air and minimize equipment footprint on jobsite.
Call 1-800-231-2085

Clemco Industries Corp.
Global engineering-trusted solutions

For more than 70 years, Clemco has provided the highest quality blast equipment with a total commitment to comfort and safety.

JAD Equipment Co.
Trak Mats: Don't get Stuck In the Mud

Trak Mats offer more than just plywood. Use over and over for years.

Technology Publishing

The Technology Publishing Network

The Journal of Protective Coatings & Linings (JPCL) PaintSquare
Durability + Design Paint BidTracker

EXPLORE:      JPCL   |   PaintSquare News   |   Interact   |   Buying Guides   |   Webinars   |   Resources   |   Classifieds
REGISTER AND SUBSCRIBE:      Free PaintSquare Registration   |   Subscribe to JPCL   |   Subscribe to PaintSquare News
MORE:      About   |   Privacy policy   |   Terms & conditions   |   Site Map   |   Search   |   Contact Us

© Copyright 2000-2015, Technology Publishing / PaintSquare, All rights reserved
2100 Wharton Street, Suite 310, Pittsburgh PA 15203-1951; Tel 1-412-431-8300; Fax 1-412-431-5428; E-mail