PaintSquare.com
Follow us on Twitter Follow us on LinkedIn Like us on Facebook Follow us on Instagram Visit the TPC Store
Search the site

 

Jokes and Humor

Jokes and Other Diversions

| More

April 5, 2010

Negative People

A woman was at her hairdresser's getting her hair styled for a trip to Rome with her husband. She mentioned the trip to the hairdresser, who responded:

"Rome? Why would anyone want to go there? It's crowded and dirty. You're crazy to go to Rome. So, how are you getting there?"

"We're taking Continental," was the reply. "We got a great rate!"

"Continental?" exclaimed the hairdresser. "That's a terrible airline. Their planes are old, their flight attendants are ugly, and they're always late. So, where are you staying in Rome?"

"We'll be at this exclusive little place over on Rome's Tiber River called Teste."

"Don't go any further. I know that place.  Everybody thinks it’s gonna be something special and exclusive, but it's really a dump."

"We're going to see the Vatican and maybe get to see the Pope."

"That's rich," laughed the hairdresser. You and a million other people trying to see him.  He'll look the size of an ant.

“Boy, good luck on this lousy trip of yours. You're going to need it."

A month later, the woman again came in to have her hair done. The hairdresser asked her about her trip to Rome.

"It was wonderful!" explained the woman, "Not only were we on time in one of Continental's brand new planes, but it was overbooked, and they bumped us up to first class. The food and wine were excellent, and I had a handsome 28-year-old flight attendant who waited on me hand and foot.

“And the hotel was great! They'd just finished a $5 million renovation, and now it's a jewel, the finest hotel in the city. They too were overbooked, so they apologized and gave us the penthouse suite at no extra charge!"

"Well," muttered the hairdresser, "that's all well and good, but I know you didn't get to see the Pope."

"Actually, we were quite lucky, because as we toured the Vatican, a Swiss Guard tapped me on the shoulder, and explained that the Pope likes to meet some of the visitors, and if I'd be so kind as to step into his private room and wait, the Pope would personally greet me.

“Sure enough, five minutes later, the Pope walked through the door and shook my hand! I knelt down and he spoke a few words to me."

"Oh, really!  What'd he say?"

He said: "Who screwed up your hair?"

Current Item rating: 4.5 out of 5

Rate this Item:


...Really?
1
2 3 4 HI-larious
5
Your Rating:


   

Humor Archive | Submit your own Item


Previous items from the past weeks

April 2, 2010
Worth Every Penny
A man and his ever-nagging wife...

April 1, 2010
Record Breakers
Sleeping Beauty, Tom Thumb, and Quasimodo were all talking...

March 31, 2010
The Zen Buddhist Monk
A Zen Buddhist monk in his saffron robes walks the streets of New York...

March 30, 2010
The Exchange Students
A Spanish woman marries an Egyptian...

March 29, 2010
The Silent Treatment
A man and his wife had a fight and were giving each other the silent treatment...

March 26, 2010
Just To Be Sure
A husband and his intellectually-challenged wife were hunting...

March 25, 2010
Dog For Sale
A guy is riding through a neighborhood and sees a sign...

March 24, 2010
No Strings Attached
A string walks into a bar...

March 23, 2010
Marriage Therapy
A man and woman who have been married for 20 years begin to have problems...

March 22, 2010
A Balanced Diet
A man goes to the doctor with a banana...

March 19, 2010
The Making of an Entrepreneur
The Town Council in a small New England town decided to help a street person who had taken up residence there...

March 17, 2010
Chillin'
Energy efficiency at its finest......

March 16, 2010
On the Witness Stand
Doctor, before you performed the autopsy...

March 15, 2010
Work Lesson
A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day. A small rabbit saw ...

March 12, 2010
A Generous Doctor
A doctor gave a man...


See humor archive
Advertisements
 
Axxiom Manufacturing
 
The Undisputed
Industry Leader.
 
Proven Innovation. Job Performance. Industry Training. Workplace Safety. Only Schmidt® abrasive blast equipment by Axxiom Manufacturing delivers it all!
 

 
SAFE Systems, Inc.
 
Portable Dust Collectors for Tough Environments
 
Trailer and skid-mounted models in numerous sizes, powered by electric and/or diesel. Sloped roofs, multiple dust inlets, high static, dampered fans. Lockable power & drive compartments.
 

 
Harsco
 
Find BLACK BEAUTY® Abrasives
 
Use our online tool to search by address, city or zip code to find where you can buy BLACK BEAUTY® abrasives. Or call us toll free: 1-888-733-3646
 

 
SABRE Autonomous Solutions
 
Quality
 
The ALPHA1 provides a consistent finish day-in
day-out; job to job.
 

 
PPG Protective and Marine Coatings Group
 
We Protect and Beautify the World
 
PPG is widely recognized as a world leader in protective and marine coatings, developing innovative, cutting-edge products and services.
 

 
Modern Safety Techniques
 
Modern Safety Techniques
 
With our unique LTCat, we can help to provide clean, safe breathing air to your workers. Take a look at our Breathing Air Systems, we supply at least twice as much charcoal as our competitors! Modern
 

 
International Bridge Conference
 
2017 International Bridge Conference
 
June 4-8, 2017, National Harbor, Maryland
 

 
Bullard
 
Upgrade with the Bullard GenVX
 
Click here to learn how you can get a GenVX Helmet and Win.
 

 
BASF
 
New resins from BASF will have metals loving water!
 
Excellent corrosion resistance, low VOC, high gloss, thin films www.basf.us/industrialcoatings dpsolutions@basf.com 800-231-7868
 

 
HoldTight Solutions Inc.
 
NO FLASH RUST - NO CONTAMINANTS
 
Our HoldTight®102 salt remover & flash rust
preventer prevents flash
rust by removing surface contaminants. Contact us
for your nearest distributor.
(800) 319.8802 sales@holdtight.com
 

 
 
 

Technology Publishing Co., 2100 Wharton Street, Suite 310, Pittsburgh PA 15203-1951

TEL 1-412-431-8300  • FAX  1-412-431-5428  •  EMAIL webmaster@paintsquare.com


The Technology Publishing Network

Durability + Design PaintSquare the Journal of Protective Coatings & Linings Paint BidTracker

 
EXPLORE:      JPCL   |   PaintSquare News   |   Interact   |   Buying Guides   |   Webinars   |   Resources   |   Classifieds
REGISTER AND SUBSCRIBE:      Free PaintSquare Registration   |   Subscribe to JPCL   |   Subscribe to PaintSquare News
MORE:      About PaintSquare.com   |   Privacy policy   |   Terms & conditions   |   Site Map   |   Search   |   Contact Us