PaintSquare.com
      | Connect Follow us on Twitter Like us on Facebook
About | Subscribe | Advertise
  

 

Jokes and Humor

Jokes and Other Diversions

| More

April 5, 2010

Negative People

A woman was at her hairdresser's getting her hair styled for a trip to Rome with her husband. She mentioned the trip to the hairdresser, who responded:

"Rome? Why would anyone want to go there? It's crowded and dirty. You're crazy to go to Rome. So, how are you getting there?"

"We're taking Continental," was the reply. "We got a great rate!"

"Continental?" exclaimed the hairdresser. "That's a terrible airline. Their planes are old, their flight attendants are ugly, and they're always late. So, where are you staying in Rome?"

"We'll be at this exclusive little place over on Rome's Tiber River called Teste."

"Don't go any further. I know that place.  Everybody thinks it’s gonna be something special and exclusive, but it's really a dump."

"We're going to see the Vatican and maybe get to see the Pope."

"That's rich," laughed the hairdresser. You and a million other people trying to see him.  He'll look the size of an ant.

“Boy, good luck on this lousy trip of yours. You're going to need it."

A month later, the woman again came in to have her hair done. The hairdresser asked her about her trip to Rome.

"It was wonderful!" explained the woman, "Not only were we on time in one of Continental's brand new planes, but it was overbooked, and they bumped us up to first class. The food and wine were excellent, and I had a handsome 28-year-old flight attendant who waited on me hand and foot.

“And the hotel was great! They'd just finished a $5 million renovation, and now it's a jewel, the finest hotel in the city. They too were overbooked, so they apologized and gave us the penthouse suite at no extra charge!"

"Well," muttered the hairdresser, "that's all well and good, but I know you didn't get to see the Pope."

"Actually, we were quite lucky, because as we toured the Vatican, a Swiss Guard tapped me on the shoulder, and explained that the Pope likes to meet some of the visitors, and if I'd be so kind as to step into his private room and wait, the Pope would personally greet me.

“Sure enough, five minutes later, the Pope walked through the door and shook my hand! I knelt down and he spoke a few words to me."

"Oh, really!  What'd he say?"

He said: "Who screwed up your hair?"

Current Item rating: 4.5 out of 5

Rate this Item:


...Really?
1
2 3 4 HI-larious
5
Your Rating:


   

Humor Archive | Submit your own Item


Previous items from the past weeks

April 2, 2010
Worth Every Penny
A man and his ever-nagging wife...

April 1, 2010
Record Breakers
Sleeping Beauty, Tom Thumb, and Quasimodo were all talking...

March 31, 2010
The Zen Buddhist Monk
A Zen Buddhist monk in his saffron robes walks the streets of New York...

March 30, 2010
The Exchange Students
A Spanish woman marries an Egyptian...

March 29, 2010
The Silent Treatment
A man and his wife had a fight and were giving each other the silent treatment...

March 26, 2010
Just To Be Sure
A husband and his intellectually-challenged wife were hunting...

March 25, 2010
Dog For Sale
A guy is riding through a neighborhood and sees a sign...

March 24, 2010
No Strings Attached
A string walks into a bar...

March 23, 2010
Marriage Therapy
A man and woman who have been married for 20 years begin to have problems...

March 22, 2010
A Balanced Diet
A man goes to the doctor with a banana...

March 19, 2010
The Making of an Entrepreneur
The Town Council in a small New England town decided to help a street person who had taken up residence there...

March 17, 2010
Chillin'
Energy efficiency at its finest......

March 16, 2010
On the Witness Stand
Doctor, before you performed the autopsy...

March 15, 2010
Work Lesson
A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day. A small rabbit saw ...

March 12, 2010
A Generous Doctor
A doctor gave a man...


See humor archive

WINOA Group
W Abrasives - Surf Prep Pack

Experts in surface preparation are not working only on greens. To discover the SURF PREP PACK dedicated to experts. Visit our website, www.wabrasives.com.


HoldTight Solutions Inc.
NO FLASH RUST - NO CONTAMINANTS

Our HoldTight®102 salt remover & flash rust
preventer prevents flash
rust by removing surface contaminants. Contact us
for your nearest distributor.
(800) 319.8802 sales@holdtight.com


Wasser High-Tech Coatings Inc.
Polyflex® Polyurea Linings

Polyflex ™ new Polyurea Geotextile Membrane System has been specifically engineered to protect the environment in containment applications.
www.polyflexlinings.com


Desco Mfg. Co., Inc.

Dust - Free Surface Prep
Made EASY!

Efficient-Fast clean/remove
Advanced Containment
Safe - Well Below OSHA
Yes! - Innovative Solutions!
DESCO Mfg.Co., Inc.
www.descomfg.com
800-337-2648


RBW Enterprises, Inc.
Robotic Blast Cleaning & Painting News

RBW Enterprises has the only portable blast cleaning machine that can clean both horizontal and vertical surfaces, and pipe See more Videos at www.rbwe.com


Dehumidifiers, Sales and Consulting
How long can you hold a WHITE-METAL BLAST?

Click to learn how 30 DAYS is easy! Don Bechtol has over 40 years of experience utilizing DH for blasting/coating projects. Call today.
1-713-249-1615
¡SE HABLA ESPAÑOL!


Sherwin-Williams
Sherwin-Williams Oil & Gas App

Our coatings and linings expertise available 24/7, allowing you to explore the best Sherwin-Williams solutions for oil refineries, shale drilling sites, and offshore. Download today!


Park Derochie Coatings Ltd.
www.ParkDerochie.com

Coatings          Fireproofing
Sandblasting     Scaffolding
Metalizing           Insulation

• Shop & Field Services
• SSPC Certified
• NACE Inspectors on staff
• New Construction &
  Maintenance Programs


SSPC: The Society for Protective Coatings
http://www.sspc.org/

Join SSPC and Enhance
Your Career !

 
 
 
Technology Publishing

The Technology Publishing Network

The Journal of Protective Coatings & Linings (JPCL) PaintSquare
Durability + Design Paint BidTracker

 
EXPLORE:      JPCL   |   PaintSquare News   |   Interact   |   Buying Guides   |   Webinars   |   Resources   |   Classifieds
REGISTER AND SUBSCRIBE:      Free PaintSquare Registration   |   Subscribe to JPCL   |   Subscribe to PaintSquare News
MORE:      About PaintSquare.com   |   Privacy policy   |   Terms & conditions   |   Site Map   |   Search   |   Contact Us
 

© Copyright 2000-2016, Technology Publishing / PaintSquare, All rights reserved
2100 Wharton Street, Suite 310, Pittsburgh PA 15203-1951; Tel 1-412-431-8300; Fax 1-412-431-5428; E-mail webmaster@paintsquare.com