| Connect Follow us on Twitter Like us on Facebook
About | Subscribe | Advertise


Jokes and Humor

Jokes and Other Diversions

| More

October 29, 2010

Election Time

Walking down the street one day, a high-ranking politician is tragically hit by a truck and dies. His soul arrives in Heaven and is met by St. Peter at the entrance.

"Welcome to Heaven," says St. Peter. "What we do with high officials like yourself is have you spend one day in Hell and one in Heaven. Then you can choose where to spend eternity."

"Really, that won’t be necessary. I want to be in Heaven," says the politician.

"I'm sorry, but we have our rules." And with that, St. Peter escorts the politician to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to Hell. The doors open and he finds himself in the middle of a green golf course. In the distance is a club and standing in front of it are all his friends and other politicians who had worked with him; everyone is very happy and in evening dress. They run to greet him, hug him, and reminisce about the good times they had while getting rich at expense of the people. They play a friendly game of golf and then dine on lobster and caviar.

Before he realizes it, it’s time to go. Everyone gives him a big hug and waves while the elevator rises. The elevator goes up, up, up and the door reopens on Heaven, where St. Peter is waiting for him.

For the next 24 hours, the politician joins a group of contented souls moving from cloud to cloud, playing the harp and singing.

"Well, then,” St. Peter says, “you've spent a day in Hell and another in Heaven. Now choose your eternity."

The politician answers, "Well, I would never have thought it, I mean Heaven has been delightful and all, but Hell was fantastic!  I choose to go there."

So St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to Hell. The doors open and he’s in the middle of a blazing, barren land covered with waste and garbage. He sees all his friends, dressed in rags, wallowing in the flaming ruins.

"I don't understand," the politician stammers to the Devil. “Yesterday I was here, and there was a golf course and club, and we ate lobster and caviar and danced and had a great time. This place promised to be wonderful, and now all that’s here is a wasteland full of garbage and my friends look miserable.”

The Devil looks at him, smiles and says, "Yesterday, we were campaigning. Today, you voted for us!"

Current Item rating: 4.8 out of 5

Rate this Item:

2 3 4 HI-larious
Your Rating:


Humor Archive | Submit your own Item

Previous items from the past weeks

October 28, 2010
The Perfect Marriage
At a party, a couple...

October 27, 2010
Afraid of the Dark
A little boy was deathly...

October 26, 2010
Bumper Stickers
Those who live by the sword...

October 25, 2010
Truths For Mature Adults
I think part of a best friend's job...

October 22, 2010
Friendship Between The Sexes
A woman didn't come home...

October 21, 2010
Over Easy
A guest in an upscale hotel...

October 20, 2010
Women & Cats
I've never understood...

October 19, 2010
UK Classified Ads
Actual classified ads from a British newspaper...

October 18, 2010
Doctor's Orders
Mrs. Smith’s elderly husband...

October 15, 2010
God is Watching
The children were...

October 14, 2010
Things I learned from TV:
All crimes are...

October 13, 2010
A police officer pulls over...

October 12, 2010
A Hard Day's Work
God: “Whew! I just created a...

October 11, 2010
Prison Hospital
Look here, doctor!...

October 8, 2010
Careful What You Wish For
Two happily married 60-year-olds...

See humor archive

Absolute Equipment/Grand Rental Station
Portable Power from Absolute Equipment

•Lighting Systems
•Light Compaction
Sales • Rental • Service
Call 1-866-931-6655
Over a century of
providing excellence.

Elcometer, Inc.
Durability & Design meet
Performance & Reliability

Elcometer 319 Dewpoint Meter
View the technical data on the Elcometer Dewpoint meter.

Sherwin-Williams Protective & Marine Coatings

With 4,000 distribution points and 3,700+ years of experience, Sherwin-Williams delivers the products, support and expertise you need, right where you need it.

Atlantic Design, Inc.

what we did to this machine! Let ADI upgrade your machine, extending the life, efficiency, and value. Any make. Like new, but better! 866.Call.ADI

Abrasives Inc.
Check our Prices for Blast Abrasives

Faced with higher abrasive costs? We invite you to call & check our rates on Black Magic® coal slag and other quality blast materials. Abrasives Inc. 800-584-7524

W Abrasives : Shot Peening Solutions

W Abrasives has developed an exclusive range of products to boost your peening and blasting performances.

AW Chesterton
ARC Protective Coatings

perform reliably under the most demanding exposures in the toughest process conditions. Use our Coating Selector Tool for your application needs at

Clemco Industries Corp.
Powerful Protection in a Small Package

Mounts inside blast helmet, alerts operator to dangerous breathing-air condition by audible, visual, and vibratory alarms. Easily calibrated, battery operated.

Fischer Technology Inc.
Measure TSA Coatings on Stainless Steel

The PHASCOPE® PMP10 from FISCHER precisely measures thermally sprayed aluminum (TSA) on stainless steel.

Technology Publishing

The Technology Publishing Network

The Journal of Protective Coatings & Linings (JPCL) PaintSquare
Durability + Design Paint BidTracker

EXPLORE:      JPCL   |   PaintSquare News   |   Interact   |   Buying Guides   |   Webinars   |   Resources   |   Classifieds
REGISTER AND SUBSCRIBE:      Free PaintSquare Registration   |   Subscribe to JPCL   |   Subscribe to PaintSquare News
MORE:      About   |   Privacy policy   |   Terms & conditions   |   Site Map   |   Search   |   Contact Us

© Copyright 2000-2015, Technology Publishing / PaintSquare, All rights reserved
2100 Wharton Street, Suite 310, Pittsburgh PA 15203-1951; Tel 1-412-431-8300; Fax 1-412-431-5428; E-mail