PaintSquare.com
      | Connect Follow us on Twitter Like us on Facebook
About | Subscribe | Advertise
  

 

Jokes and Humor

Jokes and Other Diversions

| More

June 17, 2014

Night Owls

A man is in bed with his wife when there is a knock at the door. He sees on the clock that it’s 3:30 in the morning.

The knocking gets louder, and he finally goes downstairs to find a drunk man at the door.

“Hi there,” slurs the stranger. “Can you give me a push?”

“No, get lost! It’s half past three!” says the man and slams the door.

Back upstairs, his wife says, “That wasn’t very nice. Remember that night we broke down in the rain on the way to pick up the kids and you had to knock on that man’s door to get us started again? What would have happened if he’d told us to get lost?”

So, the husband gets out of bed again and trudges back downstairs.  He steps outside but can’t see the stranger.

So he calls out, “Hey, do you still want a push?”

And a voice answers, “Yes, please!”

Still unable to see the stranger, the man asks, “Where are you?”

And the drunk replies, “Over here, on the swing set!”

Current Item rating: 3.1 out of 5

Rate this Item:


...Really?
1
2 3 4 HI-larious
5
Your Rating:


   

Humor Archive | Submit your own Item


Previous items from the past weeks

June 16, 2014
Department of Corrections
Police in Los Angeles ...

June 13, 2014
Baby on Board
A man called 911 ...

June 12, 2014
Spin Doctor
The doctor walks into ...

June 11, 2014
Watch This
Jennifer watched as the cashier...

June 11, 2014
Holy Mackerel
A couple of priests ...

June 10, 2014
Getting Wired
The lumberjack loved...

June 9, 2014
Life Explained by Graphs
Your intended career...

June 6, 2014
Dead to Rights
“Doctor, how many...

June 5, 2014
Common Sense on Trial
How was your first...

June 4, 2014
Only a Little
My daughter-in-law was driving...

June 3, 2014
How You’ve Changed!
During my mother’s...

June 2, 2014
Lampooning Lance
Two Hollywood studios...

May 30, 2014
Selling It
Time traveler needs...

May 29, 2014
Stop the Presses
British Left Waffles...

May 28, 2014
Entrepreneurial Spirit
Will code HTML for...


See humor archive

Termarust Technologies
Termarust (HR CSA) Chemically Stops
Active Corrosion

Truss bridge treated with Termarust's (HR CSA) in 1995. This highway & rail truss bridge is still stable and there still is no active corrosion.


U.S. Zinc
Historic Reliability. Innovative Performance.

We offer custom grades and packaging of zinc dust, oxide, metal and fines, U.S. Zinc provides direct shipping to locations worldwide. U.S. Zinc – Helping the world work™


NLB Corporation
Water Jets in Action

Video demo shows how
easily Vortex™ removes
coatings and more. Lawn-
mower-style water jet unit strips floors, ship decks, etc. quickly and keeps debris contained.


Modern Safety Techniques
Modern Safety Techniques

See our Low Temperature Catalyst for your CO removal needs. Help to provide your workers with safe, comfortable breathing air!


LPI Incorporated
LPI, Inc.

Manufactures air-powered man lifts for use in prep, paint and blast booths. Standard and custom designs.
Phone 800-657-6956 or www.lpi-inc.com


Carboline Company
Hyrdrocarbon Fire & Jet Fire Protection

Pyroclad X1 is the latest breakthrough in epoxy based intumescent fireproofing technology


Atlantic Design, Inc.
GOING PLACES YOU ONLY DREAM ABOUT!

We custom design.
We sell new & used.
We upgrade.
We retrofit.
We rent.
What are your equipment needs?
Cleverly simple. Clearly ADI. 866.Call.ADI


Harsco
Find BLACK BEAUTY® Abrasives

Use our online tool to search by address, city or zip code to find where you can buy BLACK BEAUTY® abrasives. Or call us toll free: 1-888-733-3646

 
 
 
Technology Publishing

The Technology Publishing Network

The Journal of Protective Coatings & Linings (JPCL) PaintSquare
Durability + Design Paint BidTracker

 
EXPLORE:      JPCL   |   PaintSquare News   |   Interact   |   Buying Guides   |   Webinars   |   Resources   |   Classifieds
REGISTER AND SUBSCRIBE:      Free PaintSquare Registration   |   Subscribe to JPCL   |   Subscribe to PaintSquare News
MORE:      About PaintSquare.com   |   Privacy policy   |   Terms & conditions   |   Site Map   |   Search   |   Contact Us
 

© Copyright 2000-2015, Technology Publishing / PaintSquare, All rights reserved
2100 Wharton Street, Suite 310, Pittsburgh PA 15203-1951; Tel 1-412-431-8300; Fax 1-412-431-5428; E-mail webmaster@paintsquare.com