PaintSquare.com
      | Connect Follow us on Twitter Like us on Facebook
About | Subscribe | Advertise
  

 

Jokes and Humor

Jokes and Other Diversions

| More

April 24, 2014

New Rules

New Rule: Stop sending me that pop-up ad for Classmates.com! There’s a reason you don’t talk to people for 25 years: because you don’t particularly like them! Besides, I already know what the captain of the football team is doing these days: mowing my lawn.

New Rule: Don’t eat anything that’s served out a window unless you’re a seagull. People are acting all shocked that a human finger was found in a bowl of fast-food chili. Hey, it cost less than a dollar. What did you expect it to contain? Trout? Luckily, it was only a finger! If it was a whole hand, Congress would have voted to keep it alive.

New Rule: Competitive eating isn’t a sport; it’s one of the seven deadly sins. ESPN recently televised the U.S. Open of Competitive Eating, because watching those athletes at the poker table was just too danged exciting. What’s next, competitive farting? Oh wait. They’re already doing that. It’s called The Howard Stern Show.

Current Item rating: 3.1 out of 5

Rate this Item:


...Really?
1
2 3 4 HI-larious
5
Your Rating:


   

Humor Archive | Submit your own Item


Previous items from the past weeks

April 23, 2014
New Miracle Diet
A doctor puts his obese...

April 22, 2014
Top Reasons I Hate My Cubicle
Damned near impossible...

April 21, 2014
Miscellaneous Terms
A person who has stopped...

April 18, 2014
Daily Prayer
Dear God...

April 17, 2014
3 For 3
My stuffing was...

April 16, 2014
New Rules
Stop saying that...

April 15, 2014
Monkey Business
A small Wild Animal Park...

April 14, 2014
Top Reasons I Hate My Cubicle
Being told to...

April 11, 2014
Hey!
A doctor calls...

April 10, 2014
Since You Asked
A truck driver is rolling...

April 9, 2014
Always Be Prepared
Dorothy and Edna...

April 8, 2014
It Was Nothing
There were still a few...

April 7, 2014
Nick of Time
A guy arrives...

April 4, 2014
Legal Lions
A gang of robbers...

April 3, 2014
Making the Grade
The nineteenth century...


See humor archive

HoldTight Solutions Inc.
NO FLASH RUST -
NO CONTAMINANTS

Our HoldTight®102 salt remover & flash rust preventer prevents flash
rust by removing surface contaminants. It has no equal; only wannabees.
Contact us for your
nearest distributor.
(800) 319.8802 sales@holdtight.com


N.T. Ruddock Co.

Our Abrasives Hold Up Under Pressure

N. T. Ruddock focuses on abrasive selection, equipment evaluation, equipment maintenance & reduction of abrasive consumption. Other services include Screen Analysis & Background Radiation Testing.


DRYCO
DEHUMIDIFICATION FOR
ANY SIZE PROJECT

Temporary climate control equipment. Dehumidifiers,
Heaters, A/C, Power, More…
Call: 866-379-2600


Greener Blast Technologies
Reinventing the Blasting Industry

Greener Blast Technology, Inc. manufactures the most effective slurry blasting system available on the market to date.


PreTox Products - NexTec, Inc.
GOT LEAD? Specify Pretox System products

The ONLY Lead Stabilizer Compatible with All Paint Removal Methods. Works with all Blast Media: Grits | Recyclable Abrasives | CO2 | Water | Power Tools | Etc. Call Dave Steffen at 800.338.8296.


T. F. Warren Group Inc.
For the tough jobs...
www.blastco-inc.com

Blastco California offers
quality and experience in the safe, on time, and on budget application of protective coatings and linings to challenging jobs and surfaces.


Mitsubishi Gas Chemical America
Performance Amine 1,3-BAC

A highly reactive cycloaliphatic diamine offering superior performance. Reasonable cost and curing efficacy makes it suitable for all types of epoxy resin applications.


Dow Polyurethane Systems
Choose the Right Coat

Dow’s high-performance, protective polyurethane spray elastomer system increases durability for steel and concrete applications.


Termarust Technologies
Termarust (HR CSA) Chemically Stops
Active Corrosion

Truss bridge treated in 2000 with Termarust's (HR CSA) field-proven rust mitigation system chemically stopped corrosion, crevice corrosion & pack rust.


Binks/DeVilbiss
Built for Tough Jobs

From Epoxies to Urethanes to other high solid coatings, the new Binks Airless 75 delivers a great finish using an ergonomic design. Visit binks.com for more information.

 
 
 
Technology Publishing

The Technology Publishing Network

The Journal of Protective Coatings & Linings (JPCL) PaintSquare
Durability + Design Paint BidTracker

 
EXPLORE:      JPCL   |   PaintSquare News   |   Interact   |   Buying Guides   |   Webinars   |   Resources   |   Classifieds
REGISTER AND SUBSCRIBE:      Free PaintSquare Registration   |   Subscribe to JPCL   |   Subscribe to PaintSquare News
MORE:      About PaintSquare.com   |   Privacy policy   |   Terms & conditions   |   Site Map   |   Search   |   Contact Us
 

© Copyright 2000-2015, Technology Publishing / PaintSquare, All rights reserved
2100 Wharton Street, Suite 310, Pittsburgh PA 15203-1951; Tel 1-412-431-8300; Fax 1-412-431-5428; E-mail webmaster@paintsquare.com