PaintSquare.com


The First Word in Protective & Marine Coatings

A Product of Technology Publishing / PaintSquare
JPCL | PaintSquare News | Durability + Design | Paint BidTracker

Jokes and Humor

Jokes and Other Diversions

| More

January 22, 2014

Your Attention, Please!

Recent actual announcements from the London Underground:

“Let the passengers off the train FIRST!” (Pause.) “Oh, go on then, stuff yourselves in like sardines, see if I care; I'm going home.”

“Please allow the doors to close. Try not to confuse this with 'Please hold the doors open.' The two are distinct and separate instructions.”

“Please note that the beeping noise coming from the doors means that the doors are about to close. It does not mean throw yourself or your bags into the doors.”

“We can't move off because some idiot has their hand stuck in the door.”

Current Item rating: 3.0 out of 5

Rate this Item:


...Really?
1
2 3 4 HI-larious
5
Your Rating:


   

Humor Archive | Submit your own Item


Previous items from the past weeks

January 21, 2014
Your Attention, Please!
Ladies and Gentlemen...

January 20, 2014
Extra, Extra!
News from the UK!...

January 17, 2014
Extra, Extra!
News from the UK!...

January 16, 2014
Gone Fishin’
A man calls home...

January 15, 2014
3 Wise Men
Three men died...

January 14, 2014
Making a Good Thing Better
A priest says...

January 13, 2014
Pardon Me
Roy Rogers is...

January 10, 2014
The Truth About Exercise
I don’t jog...

January 9, 2014
The Truth About Exercise
I have flabby...

January 8, 2014
The Truth About Exercise
I have to exercise...

January 7, 2014
The Truth About Exercise
My grandmother started...

January 6, 2014
3 Types
There are three...

January 3, 2014
Before It's Too Late
Minister Reeves was...

January 2, 2014
Extra! Extra!
Rangers get whiff...

December 31, 2013
Extra! Extra!
Starvation can lead...


See humor archive

Advanced Recycling Systems
ADVANCED RECYCLING SYSTEMS (ARS)

Recycling Machines, Dust Collectors, Rapid Deployment units are time-tested and approved for the rugged industrial environment. Contact ARS today!
(330)536-8210


Termarust Technologies
Termarust (HR CSA) Chemically Stops
Active Corrosion

Truss bridge treated in 2000 with Termarust's (HR CSA) field-proven rust mitigation system chemically stopped corrosion, crevice corrosion & pack rust.


Elcometer, Inc.
Durability & Design meet
Performance & Reliability

Elcometer 319 Dewpoint Meter
View the technical data on the Elcometer Dewpoint meter.


Mohawk Garnet
Enska by Mohawk Garnet™

A safe, efficient and economical abrasive alternative to slag and sand products. More information
at 1.866.642.7638 or info@mohawkgarnet.com Email for follow up – mheilimo@mohawkgarnet.com


N.T. Ruddock Co.

Our Abrasives Hold Up Under Pressure

N. T. Ruddock focuses on abrasive selection, equipment evaluation, equipment maintenance & reduction of abrasive consumption. Other services include Screen Analysis & Background Radiation Testing.


NLB Corporation
VacLance cleans up as you work

Add vacuum recovery to any NLB rotating water jet lance with a VacLance attachment and vacuum source. Model DM32283 works vertically, horizontally and in corners.


Atlantic Design, Inc.
POWER ON WITH ADI!

The most air flow possible… In the smallest package imaginable… For a price you won’t believe! 866.Call.ADI

 
 
 
Technology Publishing

The Technology Publishing Network

The Journal of Protective Coatings & Linings (JPCL) PaintSquare
Durability + Design Paint BidTracker JPCL Europe

 
EXPLORE:      JPCL   |   PaintSquare News   |   Interact   |   Buying Guides   |   Webinars   |   Resources   |   Classifieds
REGISTER AND SUBSCRIBE:      Free PaintSquare Registration   |   Subscribe to JPCL   |   Subscribe to PaintSquare News
MORE:      About PaintSquare.com   |   Privacy policy   |   Terms & conditions   |   Site Map   |   Search   |   Contact Us
 

© Copyright 2000-2014, Technology Publishing / PaintSquare, All rights reserved
2100 Wharton Street, Suite 310, Pittsburgh PA 15203-1951; Tel 1-412-431-8300; Fax 1-412-431-5428; E-mail webmaster@paintsquare.com