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July 16, 2013

It's All Relative

One Sunday morning, Joe burst into the living room and said, “Dad! Mom! I have some great news for you! I am getting married to the most beautiful girl in town. She lives a block away, and her name is Susan.”

After dinner, Joe’s dad took him aside and said, “Son, I have to talk with you. I used to cheat on your mother a lot. Susan is actually your half-sister. I’m afraid you can’t marry her.”

Joe was heartbroken. He eventually started dating again and about a year later he came home and very proudly announced, “Dianne said yes! We are getting married in June.”

Once again, his father insisted on another private conversation. “Diane is your half-sister, too, Joe. I am very sorry about this.”

This time, Joe was furious. He finally decided to go to his mother with the news.

“I’m never going to get married,” he complained. “Every time I fall in love, Dad tells me the girl is my half-sister.”

His mother just shook her head and said, “Don’t worry, dear. He’s not really your father.”

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