PaintSquare.com
      | Connect Follow us on Twitter Like us on Facebook
About | Subscribe | Advertise
  

 

Jokes and Humor

Jokes and Other Diversions

| More

April 25, 2013

You're a Statue

A woman and her lover are in bed together when her husband comes home. The woman jumps up, shoves the guy into the corner, rubs him down in baby oil, and douses him in talcum powder.

“Don’t move!” she shouts. “You’re a statue!”

When the husband comes upstairs and asks about the new decoration, the wife explains that the Smiths next door had recently acquired a statue for their bedroom--and if they could, so could she.

The couple goes to bed, but at midnight the husband goes downstairs, gets a glass of milk and some cookies, and comes back upstairs.

He hands the snack to the statue and says, “Here. I stood around for three days at the Smiths, and they never fed me a thing!”

Current Item rating: 3.9 out of 5

Rate this Item:


...Really?
1
2 3 4 HI-larious
5
Your Rating:


   

Humor Archive | Submit your own Item


Previous items from the past weeks

April 24, 2013
Big Mistake
Last night I reached...

April 23, 2013
15 Things We Wouldn’t Know if it Wasn’t for the Movies
The ventilation system...

April 22, 2013
Dear Diary
Tonight, I thought my husband...

April 19, 2013
News Headlines
Survivor of Siamese...

April 18, 2013
Killer Service
One Sunday morning...

April 17, 2013
It's All Relative
A poor man walking...

April 16, 2013
News Headlines
Lansing Residents...

April 15, 2013
Let's Be Honest
A cabbie picks up...

April 12, 2013
Major Deterrent
As a pre-med student...

April 11, 2013
Switching Off
A couple celebrated...

April 10, 2013
Walking it Off
A drunk gets on a bus...

April 9, 2013
Words of Wisdom
All that glitters...

April 8, 2013
You Must be Kidding
A lazy executive...

April 5, 2013
The Object of the Game
A group of coworkers...

April 4, 2013
Everybody's a Critic
A smart old lady...


See humor archive

International Paint/AkzoNobel
Light Duty Protective Coatings

Check out our expanded line of alkyd, acrylic and waterborne epoxy coatings.


Front-Line Coatings
Why are energy utility companies switching to FLC 7 ?

FLC7, single component acrylic urethane, 65% solids, HAZMAT friendly, reduces substrate preparations, simplifies application/cleanup. www.frontlinecoatings.com


SEMicro Division, M.E. Taylor Engineering, Inc.
Coatings Adhesion Testers

The PATTI® accurately measures the bond strength between coating & substrate. Outfitted properly, the surface can be rough, porous, or curved & >10K psi strong!


ITW Binks
Built for Tough Jobs

From Epoxies to Urethanes to other high solid coatings, the new Binks Airless 75 delivers a great finish using an ergonomic design. Visit binks.com for more information.


N.T. Ruddock Co.

Our Abrasives Hold Up Under Pressure

N. T. Ruddock focuses on abrasive selection, equipment evaluation, equipment maintenance & reduction of abrasive consumption. Other services include Screen Analysis & Background Radiation Testing.


Fischer Technology Inc.
Measure TSA Coatings on Stainless Steel

The PHASCOPE® PMP10 from FISCHER precisely measures thermally sprayed aluminum (TSA) on stainless steel.


Nationwide Overspray
Profession Overspray Removal Services

The Finest Name in Safe Overspray Removal. We specialize in removing all contaminants from any surface. Family Owned and Operated for 33 years! Fully insured. Satisfaction is guaranteed.


US Minerals
US Minerals -
Black Magnum

With nationwide production and distribution capabilities, U.S. Minerals supplies a complete range of coal slag and other abrasives to meet all of your blasting needs.


RBW Enterprises, Inc.
Robotic Blast Cleaning & Painting News

RBW Enterprises has the only portable blast cleaning machine that can clean both horizontal and vertical surfaces, and pipe See more Videos at www.rbwe.com


DeFelsko Corporation
The Next Generation PosiTest AT-A

NEW Automatic Adhesion Tester features touch screen, adjustable pull-rate, pull limit, hold times, and nature of fracture/user notes.

 
 
 
Technology Publishing

The Technology Publishing Network

The Journal of Protective Coatings & Linings (JPCL) PaintSquare
Durability + Design Paint BidTracker

 
EXPLORE:      JPCL   |   PaintSquare News   |   Interact   |   Buying Guides   |   Webinars   |   Resources   |   Classifieds
REGISTER AND SUBSCRIBE:      Free PaintSquare Registration   |   Subscribe to JPCL   |   Subscribe to PaintSquare News
MORE:      About PaintSquare.com   |   Privacy policy   |   Terms & conditions   |   Site Map   |   Search   |   Contact Us
 

© Copyright 2000-2016, Technology Publishing / PaintSquare, All rights reserved
2100 Wharton Street, Suite 310, Pittsburgh PA 15203-1951; Tel 1-412-431-8300; Fax 1-412-431-5428; E-mail webmaster@paintsquare.com