PaintSquare.com


The First Word in Protective & Marine Coatings

A Product of Technology Publishing / PaintSquare
JPCL | PaintSquare News | Durability + Design | Paint BidTracker

Jokes and Humor

Jokes and Other Diversions

| More

April 25, 2013

You're a Statue

A woman and her lover are in bed together when her husband comes home. The woman jumps up, shoves the guy into the corner, rubs him down in baby oil, and douses him in talcum powder.

“Don’t move!” she shouts. “You’re a statue!”

When the husband comes upstairs and asks about the new decoration, the wife explains that the Smiths next door had recently acquired a statue for their bedroom--and if they could, so could she.

The couple goes to bed, but at midnight the husband goes downstairs, gets a glass of milk and some cookies, and comes back upstairs.

He hands the snack to the statue and says, “Here. I stood around for three days at the Smiths, and they never fed me a thing!”

Current Item rating: 3.9 out of 5

Rate this Item:


...Really?
1
2 3 4 HI-larious
5
Your Rating:


   

Humor Archive | Submit your own Item


Previous items from the past weeks

April 24, 2013
Big Mistake
Last night I reached...

April 23, 2013
15 Things We Wouldn’t Know if it Wasn’t for the Movies
The ventilation system...

April 22, 2013
Dear Diary
Tonight, I thought my husband...

April 19, 2013
News Headlines
Survivor of Siamese...

April 18, 2013
Killer Service
One Sunday morning...

April 17, 2013
It's All Relative
A poor man walking...

April 16, 2013
News Headlines
Lansing Residents...

April 15, 2013
Let's Be Honest
A cabbie picks up...

April 12, 2013
Major Deterrent
As a pre-med student...

April 11, 2013
Switching Off
A couple celebrated...

April 10, 2013
Walking it Off
A drunk gets on a bus...

April 9, 2013
Words of Wisdom
All that glitters...

April 8, 2013
You Must be Kidding
A lazy executive...

April 5, 2013
The Object of the Game
A group of coworkers...

April 4, 2013
Everybody's a Critic
A smart old lady...


See humor archive

Mohawk Garnet
Mohawk Garnet™ – North American Hard Rock

Rough around the edges – which is what you want in your abrasive. More information at 1.866.642.7638 or info@mohawkgarnet.com


Polyval Coatings
Polyflex® Polyurea Linings

exhibit outstanding versatility in use; providing abrasion resistance, superior seamless waterproofing and high-chem corrosion protection. www.polyflexlinings.com


Dampney Co., Inc.
Solar Coating

High Temperature Resistant for Solar Panels/Collectors/Tubes. Achieve selectivity with the economy and ease
of application of a paint.


U.S. Zinc

With multiple locations, ample capacity and a proven safety record, U.S. Zinc offers supply security to customers around the globe. Helping the world work™


MMLJ
Superfast Dustless Abrasive Blasting - Watch Video

Dustless Blasting creates no dust plume so others can work nearby unaffected. Maximize Productivity! Watch our numerous YouTube videos to learn more.


SAFE Systems, Inc.
Portable Dust Collectors for Tough Environments

Trailer and skid-mounted models in numerous sizes, powered by electric and/or diesel. Sloped roofs, multiple dust inlets, high static, dampered fans. Lockable power & drive compartments.


N.T. Ruddock Co.

Our Abrasives Hold Up Under Pressure

N. T. Ruddock focuses on abrasive selection, equipment evaluation, equipment maintenance & reduction of abrasive consumption. Other services include Screen Analysis & Background Radiation Testing.

 
 
 
Technology Publishing

The Technology Publishing Network

The Journal of Protective Coatings & Linings (JPCL) PaintSquare
Durability + Design Paint BidTracker JPCL Europe

 
EXPLORE:      JPCL   |   PaintSquare News   |   Interact   |   Buying Guides   |   Webinars   |   Resources   |   Classifieds
REGISTER AND SUBSCRIBE:      Free PaintSquare Registration   |   Subscribe to JPCL   |   Subscribe to PaintSquare News
MORE:      About PaintSquare.com   |   Privacy policy   |   Terms & conditions   |   Site Map   |   Search   |   Contact Us
 

© Copyright 2000-2014, Technology Publishing / PaintSquare, All rights reserved
2100 Wharton Street, Suite 310, Pittsburgh PA 15203-1951; Tel 1-412-431-8300; Fax 1-412-431-5428; E-mail webmaster@paintsquare.com